Tangled Feeling Called Love
by Aslan Night
Summary: Disclaimer: Bioware owns everything Mass Effect 1&2 and beyond and all the character therein! Venetia Shepard and Kaidan Alenko are totally attracted to each other, but don t know how to deal with it Spoilers


Bioware owns Mass Effect and all the characters herein.

Aslanasadi wanted to share with you what she felt her Shepard experienced. She asked me to accompany her on the journey, so you're going to get a bit of both of us. She wants it to be fun, and I tend towards sappy so who knows what will come of it. This is the first chapter and the story is all hers, the word crafting of it is mine (okay and I added here and there and may have changed some things a bit). We hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Firsts**

_Ouch! Damn it I hate this. Why do they have to put The privacy screen so close, I mean really they have room above and below these things. Must have been designed by men. _Venetia Shepard had grown up on spaceships all her life and yet this still wasn't the first time she had hit her head on the privacy screen over a pod. You think she would have learned by now. The clock alarm sounding caused her to jump up in shock and that's when she hit her head. The alarm had made a different sound then she was used to hence the reason she jumped up. She glanced at the clock again zero five fifteen hours, she still had forty five minutes before she had to be ready. She climbed out from under the blankets and hung her legs over the edge of the pod. She sat up and stretched before finally getting up.

She glanced around at the surrounding bunks. _Well at least I didn't wake up anyone else. Not even the marine next to me, now what the hell was her name. Well it'll come to me. It doesn't help that I've never been good with names. In my defense I just arrived a only few days ago and besides Captain Anderson I haven't met any of them before._ She can't see the female through the pod privacy screen, but pictures her from memory. _Nope still not getting a name_. She quickly dresses, putting on a shirt and pulling on sweat pants. She grabs her toiletries, a change of clothes and a towel and heads towards the shower. _At least the women here don't have to share a shower with the men. Some of the smaller ships I've served on you had to share, and if you forgot to switch the indicator you could be in for a big surprise. _

Shepard is proud to be serving on the Normandy, the Alliance's newest warship. The ship is special for several reasons. One of the reasons being it is the first ship to be commissioned that has been built by both turian and human engineers. Second it is the first ship to incorporate both human and turian design. There are also some innovations that no other ship has like the stealth systems.

In a few hours the ship would be reaching Eden prime, an earth colony. It was said that it was one of the most beautiful colonies in space. Having never been there before Shepard couldn't say if it was the truth or not, but they said it was a paradise. _Captain Anderson could have given me a bit more information about the planet. A few more details about the orders he had received might have been nice also since there was a Spectre on board._ The turian Spectre his name was Nihlus Kryik, had the uncomfortable habit of showing up unexpectedly where ever Shepard happened to be. He also seemed to come up with the oddest questions at times. At first she felt an urge to just punch him and get it over with, but once she got used to him, he wasn't that bad.

Since surviving the Blitz and becoming a War Hero her career has just gained momentum, and didn't appear to be slowing down any time soon. But then she took after her parents. Both career military, her mother on track to be a Captain, and her father fully ensconced in Military Intelligence and surrounded by intrigue. Mum had always hoped that she would enter university instead of following in their footsteps, but she was too much like her dad to have done that. _See Mum I am making good even without the title Doctor in front of my name._

So intent on her thoughts she didn't check the door to the shower before opening it and entering the room. As the door closed she was surprised by a voice and dropped her toiletries on the floor. The voice was male.

"Excuse me Commander but I think you used the wrong door." The man said.

Shepard looked up into the deep brown eyes of the Normandy's Staff Lieutenant, she thinks his name was Kaidan Alenko. _Sure, you have no problem remembering the cute lieutenant's name she berates herself._ She can feel the heat rising to her face as he stands there calmly clad in only a towel with a second one thrown over his shoulder. She stares at him and notices that the exposed parts of his body have little beads of moisture on them and his black tightly curled hair is still damp obviously fresh from the shower. She notices the fine sculpted muscles defined wonderfully through his taught tan skin. _Oh my, he puts me in mind of a Greek god_ she almost sighs out loud. The flush on her face grows to match the flush that is running through her body. She stands there a moment before she realizes that she has been staring a bit longer than manors would allow for.

As she stares she notices him raises an eyebrow at her inaction and he is waiting for her to respond.

"Oh… Uff… I mean, sorry. Eh… I guess I was a bit absorbed in my thoughts and wasn't paying attention. I am really very sorry Lieutenant, excuse me."

Not waiting for a response she grabs for her things from the floor and beats a hasty retreat out the door. She rushes over to the other door and this time checks to make sure it is the correct door before entering. Rushing inside she notices the female shower has a lock on it, which she wastes no time engaging before falling back on the door before releasing a big sigh of relief. _It does seem that no matter where I go I always end up in these strange and awkward situations. _She closes her eyes and feels her heart racing as she sees visions of the Staff Lieutenant clad only in a towel dance across her eyelids. _Oh come on Venetia Shepard, you are not a teenager anymore, stop acting like a child. It's not like you haven't see a half naked man before. _She bites her bottom lip _but he does seem to resemble a god. _She giggles at her silliness and shakes her head. Catching a glimpse of her face in the mirror, she can't help but stick her tongue out at her reflection._ Maybe all I need is a cool shower to curb my libido._

The shower does indeed return Shepard to some form of normalcy. She feels relaxed and refreshed. She runs a comb through her hair, it's cut in a blond bob that always turns in whatever direction it wants, and is beyond her control. While turning her head she catches sight of the large scar along her right cheek. She acquired this scar in the Blitz along with the one on her mouth. _Nothing to be ashamed of there. I saved a lot of lives getting these scars._ She lovingly runs her finger from the top of the scar to the bottom. _Boy, does that bring back memories. She m_oves her fingers to trace the second scar on the left side of her mouth that runs from the top of her top lip to the bottom of her bottom lip. _Well it could have been worse, even with the scars, I think I am still pretty. Not beautiful for sure, but pretty, yeah I think I'm alright._ Her bright blue eyes stare out at her _a gift from my dad, mom used to tell me. I do love looking into his beautiful blue eyes. _She used just a little bit of mascara and some eye liner to accentuate her eyes and added a bit of lipstick.

She puts on her ACU's and checks herself in the mirror one more time to make sure everything is in place. Gathering her things she retreats back to her locker and stows her gear. Her stomach is growling already just from her overnight fast. She was a Vanguard and that meant she had to feed her biotic appetite plenty and often if she wanted to keep her energy up. She loved to eat, especially chocolate, you might even say she was a chocoholic. _It's a pity my grandparents haven't send any chocolate from earth yet, I could really go for a bit right now._

* * *

Shepard heads down to the mess. The food on board isn't what she would normally refer to as good, but it is nutritious. At least the coffee is decent. Gathering her breakfast and a cup of coffee Shepard walks over to the table. Dr. Chakwas is sitting there enjoying her meal.

"Good morning Dr. Chakwas, is it okay if I join you?" Shepard asks..

"Why, certainly Commander and a good morning to you too." she answers adding a friendly smile. "I hope you slept well."

"Yes actually I did sleep well, thank you."

"How are you finding your new surroundings?" Dr Chakwas asks.

Remembering the incident in the shower this morning Shepard says "I think there are some very interesting things to see here."

"Yes, the Normandy is state of the art. I am really pleased with the set up in the med bay."

"I would think they gave you the most up to date equipment they could get their hands on."

"Oh yes, they have some of the latest innovations on this ship" the doctor tells her.

Enjoying the company they continue their conversation. Shepard looks just as Lieutenant Alenko enters the mess. He catches her eye and smiles at her. She feels herself blush as she smiles back. She thinks she can see a twinkle in his eye. She watches as he walks over and collects his breakfast. He then heads towards them taking the seat next to Dr. Chakwas. Just as he takes his seat Corporal Jenkins enters and comes over to Shepard.

"Commander, Presley is requesting you contact him in CIC as soon as you're available." Jenkins tells her.

"I'll go right away, thank you Corporal." She tells him getting up.

Kaidan watches as Commander Shepard walks over to the cleaning chute and drops in her dishes. Too bad she has to leave. His eyes follow her all the way around as she exit the mess. _Well she was a lot more composed for this meeting with me then she had been this morning._ He couldn't help but smile at her reaction when she found her self in the wrong bathroom._ Dropped her things and just stared at me. I wonder, did she like what she saw. Stop it Kaidan, that's your commanding officer there. But her blushing brought such a nice color to her face._ _Hmm I wonder if..._

"A penny for you thoughts, or maybe two, since it looks like a very nice thought." Dr. Chakwas says jarring Kaidan out of his revere.

"Oh, well... I was just thinking that Commander Shepard is actually very different from what I expected she would be." he tells her.

"Yes I watched you watching her. Different from what you expected huh? Well what were you expecting her to be like?"

Kaidan shrugs his shoulders and grins. "She is a war hero isn't she. I mean there aren't many people that are running around out there with her reputation, and still I haven't seen even an inkling of a bad attitude. She commands respect and treats everyone in kind from the lowly PFC to the high ranking officers. I find it refreshing."

"Yes I find her quite likable too. So you were just staring at her with a smile on your face because you respected her." Dr. Chakwas asked with a smile on her face.

Kaidan felt the blood rushing to his cheeks but he could do nothing to stop it. Yes they had only been on the ship for a short time, but because of his medical training and his migraines he spent more time with the doctor then anyone else. Also because he tended to keep to himself, since being an L2 biotic was something people didn't necessarily trust. There were rumors around that L2s were unstable, unfortunately some of those rumors were true. The doctor took their association as a friendship and since it had been a while since he as a simple friend, he accepted her as such.

"Yes, doctor, only out of respect. I have not forgotten the regs. No fraternization."

"Sometimes Kaidan..." The doctor said as she got up to toss her plate in to the cleaning chute. "you are just such a stick in the mud."

* * *

Walking into CIC Shepard sees Presley look up at her. "Good morning Commander." he says.

"Good Morning Presley. What do you need me for?"

"The Captain wanted me to advise you about your ground team for Eden Prime. I am sure he thought you could choose your own but since he had additional knowledge in this case he decided to assign you a squad. Captain Anderson would have told you himself but he has been tied up with paperwork and such so he asked that I advise you."

"Alright." Shepard was certainly not surprised that Anderson picked the squad.

"Yes you will be taking Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko and Corporal Richard Jenkins. Jenkins grew up on Eden Prime so his knowledge of the colony should prove useful. He is green, but got through basic with honors so you might have to deal with his exuberance, but I am sure you can handle it."

"Now Alenko," Presley continued, "is a L2 who has been highly commended and his record speaks for itself..."

"The Lieutenant is an L2? That is interesting. I did note in his file that he was biotic of course. I am an L3. I've never met an L2 before... Oh sorry Presley, I didn't mean to interrupt, I was just a bit surprised. Continue, please."

"It's fine Commander. Don't ask me to go into the differences between L2 or L3, as I am sure you know more than I do anyway. The Captain looks quite highly on Alenko so I am sure you will be happy with him since you two always seem to be on the same page according to the Captain."

"Yes, we do actually seem to have similar leanings when it comes to squad make up. It was nice of him to say. Did he happen to give you anymore insight as to what we are going to Eden Prime for or what the mission will entail? The briefing was pretty sparse in detail."

"No Commander I am afraid you have the same information that I do."

"I just keep getting the feeling that he isn't telling us everything."

"Yes well this crew is a poster for over qualification that is for sure, and that is just starting with you and Anderson. I mean you don't assign someone like Anderson for a shake down run, or yourself, a War Hero for the same reasons. Almost all the marines assigned here are top of class or highly decorated. Even Adams and I have records full of commendations. Something is up, and I don't know if it's good."

"Well we will just have to see, won't we. Is there anything else I need to know, I would like to go up and watch the relay jump and I want to get my armor on first."

"No Commander, that's all for now. Sorry I didn't have more information for you."

"That's quite alright Presley, you gave me more information than I had."

* * *

Having Changed into her armor, Shepard walks into the cockpit. She notices that Nihlus Kryik is already standing there. He might just be interested because he is a turian and their might be some racial pride in observing the jump, but she doubted it. He didn't seem the type. _Turians always look like overgrown grasshoppers in armor to me. Hey maybe grasshoppers are in their genetic make up. Okay I better stop before I get lost in silly. This is so not the time for it._

Jeff "Joker" Moreau, the pilot is sitting in the center chair manipulating the console and readying the ship for the jump. She looks to his right and is surprised to see Lieutenant Alenko siting in the other chair. _Well his file does say engineering, maybe he is monitoring or assisting. It is a new ship, they may have to make adjustments on the fly so to speak._

"Good morning Nihlus." Shepard says greeting the turian. She notices the lieutenant's head swing around to look at her out of the corner of her eye.

"Good morning Commander, I see you are curious too." Nihlus answers.

"Yes I wanted to observe the jump and see how the new ship responds." She looks at the lieutenant and he returns his eyes to his console.

Joker starts the countdown and all attention is on him now. He makes the jump and Shepard has that old familiar feeling of going down the first hill of a roller coaster. She knows that the feeling can often cause vomiting in people who are not used to it, but having grown up as a spacer child (which is what career officers' kids were called) she has no problems in that area. In fact truth be told she really does enjoy a relay jump. _I love the thrill it sends through your body._ Joker anounces that the drift is just under fifteen hundred K which is excellent.

"Fifteen hundred k is good, your captain will be pleased. Commander." Nihlus takes his leave of her as he heads back towards the CIC.

The lieutenant and Joker comment about Nihlus's rather unenthusiastic response to the amazing accuracy of the jump. _Yes, well I agree that Nihlus could have shown a little more enthusiasm. Joker is an artist in the cockpit, but like every artist he is really thin-skinned when it comes to criticism of his work. Of course if I say anything now it will seem like he solicited the compliment. _She listens to the banter between the two males with a small smile on her lips. Then Joker veers off into comments about the mission having more to it then meets the eye, she agrees that it does and says so. Just then Captain Anderson interrupts and he requests that she join him in the Comm Room. She comments that he sounds angry, but Joker says he always sounds that way when he talks to him. But she can't help to think that something has gone wrong with the mission. She turns and heads back to the Comm Room.

Before reaching the Comm Room she runs into Dr. Chakwas again standing with an overly enthusiastic Corporal Jenkins. He takes off spouting how he is really itching for some action and Shepard does her best to try and tone him down. She cautions him trying to keep the young man out of trouble. Obviously her cautions are going unregistered because he immediately brings up the Blitz and her part in it. She advises him that she was only doing her job and didn't set out to be a hero.

_Hero of the Blitz, yeah, seems everyone can't help not bringing it up. Just another reason to not see the person but look at the shell instead. I am so much more than that. The men and women that came out of the woodwork after, who wouldn't have looked at her twice before, now trying to get in her good graces. They can just kiss my ass. At least I have my own two feet firmly planted in the grown so to speak. Gawd, do they really think that I am that naïve? I am so glad I know the difference between people like that and real friends._ She excused her self after the Corporal and the doctor advise her of their views of Spectres.

Entering the Comm Room she doesn't see the Captain but notices that Nihlus is there already. As she comes to stand by him he starts in with one of his odd question sessions. She gets a little irritated but answers him truthfully and asks questions of her own. The Captain's arrival curbs the conversation. He finally gives her the information he has been holding back about the Beacon, a relict left behind by the Protheans, that has been found on Eden Prime. He and Nihlus also inform her that they are grooming her to become a Spectre candidate. It seems Nihlus has already entered her name as an actual candidate to be the first human Spectre. _Great if my life wasn't complicated enough now I am supposed to be a sheriff for the Council, my life just gets better and better. Well it does explain why I keep running into Nihlus. In a way he has been stalking me the whole time. Well at least Mum and Dad will be proud... if I should happen to make it that is._

Just as the briefing was ending Joker came over the comm and advised they were receiving a transmission from Eden Prime that the Captain had to see. Switching it over to the Comm Room, it showed a marine squad under attack and marines dying. It showed something that looked like a giant bug or claw that appeared to be a ship. It was obvious that Eden Prime was under some sort of attack. Why would anyone want to attack Eden Prime a beautiful, peaceful farm colony? None of it made sense. This made things much more complicated. One thing for sure, this mission was no longer going to be a simple walk in the park... for anyone.


End file.
